It’s been a long time since I shared a post like this. It’s good to be back!
I have been looking forward to getting my first job since I turned sixteen. I was always on the lookout, keeping my eyes open for ‘Help Wanted’ and ‘Now Hiring’ signs, thinking about what it would be like to work at various types of places. I prayed about it often – I figured that since I was of working age, then the next step the Lord would have made possible for my life would be to help support my family financially, and at the same time enjoy having a new life experience.
As I now know, that was never to be part of His plans for me. I turned nineteen a few months ago, and I haven’t gotten my first job yet.
To say that this has been hard to accept would be a complete understatement. It has been an absolute struggle for me at times when I’ve believed that life keeps going, and then here I am, stuck in a situation I feel out of place in. I’ve really let it get to my head at times.
I was defining myself by what I didn’t have, what I wasn’t doing, what I couldn’t achieve, and that made me lose sight of all the beautiful things the Lord has planned for me.
Late last month, I went to my second (and quite possibly last) job interview, and it didn’t go very well. I was contacted via email a few days later by the company, where they formally let me know that they had chosen to move forward with other applicants, and not me.
It really hurt, but at the same time, it set me free.
Have you ever marveled over the fact that the Lord can use the most painful of things for our good and His glory? I still don’t understand how He does it, but I suppose that’s the beauty of it – He works in beautiful of ways that we’ll never even fully understand. Even when we don’t get it, He does! We don’t have to figure it all out, because He already has.
On the day that I got back home from that job interview, I knew that the reason I’d gone wasn’t actually to get the job at all. That experience is part of my story for other reasons entirely: to teach me more about what the Lord has in store for me, and to encourage others who may be in a similar situation.
The Lord has asked me to release my job search to Him. It took me three years to willingly surrender, and looking back, I really wish I would have trusted Him with it all sooner. If I had allowed my faith to rest in Him and truly left it in His hands, I wouldn’t have put myself through all the heartache I’ve experienced these past few years. I continually took matters into my own hands because I felt like He was making a mistake, and I believed in my heart that it was wrong for me not to be working. I’d convinced myself of this for so long that I could no longer trust Him with it, because in my mind, I was the only one I could trust.
I no longer feel like that at all. One thing He has continually been teaching me is just how trustworthy He is. Even when He’s asked me to give up something that once really mattered to me, He refilled that place in my life that mattered so much more, to me and to Him.
I am now learning that the things that matter the most in my life are gifts from the Lord. That includes people, hobbies, places, situations, countries (shoutout to you, Guatemala!), etc. – when He is at work in my heart toward a specific thing (anything, really!), then all of the time I invest in it is worthwhile. Sometimes, there are seasons of my life dedicated to teaching me something extremely important in my walk with Him. It may not be evident to others (or even to me), but looking back, I know not a moment has been wasted when I spent it following Him. ❤ ❤ ❤
So, is there anything in your life you’re really wanting to pursue, but it just isn’t quite working out? Bring it before the Lord. Share with Him what’s on your heart. He cares for you more than you care for yourself. His timing is infinitely greater than ours, and even when waiting is painful, He is right there walking beside us the entire time. ❤
Take all of the things that are on your heart at the moment and lay them down at the foot of the cross. They are on your heart for a reason. Whether those plans will be fulfilled very soon, or one day in the future, allow the Lord to use the dreams He has given you for His glory and your good.
“Roll your works upon the Lord [commit and trust them wholly to Him; He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and] so shall your plans be established and succeed.” – Proverbs 16:3
I’m praying you have a beautiful week! If you’d like to chat in the comments below, I’d love to hear from you. 🙂