Hi there! I hope you’re having a beautiful Friday. 🙂 It absolutely amazes me that it has been two and a half years since the Lord placed this Guatemalan dream on my heart. It also marks the same amount of time that I’ve had this blog, which is another huge thing to celebrate!
I am so thankful that the Lord has kept bringing me back to posting on Dreaming of Guatemala. Despite my desire over the years to start fresh with a new blog, and even to stop blogging completely at times, He just keeps bringing me back to this online space. There were days when I’d wonder why He wanted me to stay with something that I’ve been so inconsistent with … but I’m realizing more and more that through this platform, the Lord is helping me to face a lot of things He desires to heal within me.
Blogging helps me to face and overcome my indecision. That is my absolute biggest flaw – there’s no doubt in my mind about that. (Funny, the one thing I’m certain about, is my indecision! Haha!) I’ve tried starting new blogs, new post series, etc., because I thought that to stop feeling indecisive, starting over was the only way to fix it. However, the Lord has taught me that it’s not about finding something new that feels right; it’s about making what He has given me to accomplish and overcome work in my life. So, I tried all sorts of new blogging things, when all He really wanted me to do was allow Him to work through me on Dreaming of Guatemala. The posts I write are meant to inspire and help others, but they are also an encouragement, inspiration, and motivation right back at me.
When I allow the Lord to use the gifts and talents He has given me for His glory, everything I do in service for others also blesses me immensely.
The Lord is teaching me how I can use my need to be productive in my service to Him. I’ve shared before that I feel the incessant need to be completely productive with my time. I’ll believe that if I’m not doing something worthwhile in any given moment, then I’m making an awful decision that I’ll regret later. Because of how strong my mind is, it is easy for me to become a workaholic (even though I’m not employed … haha!). Over these past few years, the Lord has shown me how I can turn this tendency of mine into a blessing for others. It satisfies my need to be doing something worthwhile, and I get to help others at the same time.
I’ve learned that the struggles the Lord has given me were never to tear me down, but to build me up. When I look at the things I have a hard time doing, or that were very hard for me to go through with, it’s tempting to feel like I’m stuck with a lifelong issue that will always haunt me. I’ve gotten really down at times because I was looking at my struggles from a human viewpoint, and yeah, things are rather hopeless when I see them from that angle. When I’m willing to lay those things down at the Lord’s feet, however, He is able to use my pain, confusion, and discomfort for my good and His glory. I have seen, time and time again, that in His strength and love, all of my broken pieces are a beautiful part of the puzzle that is my life.
There are so many things that don’t make sense to me when I’m going through them, but when I take a step back and look at the whole picture, I’m able to see how all things work together for the good.
Guatemala has been a constant reminder to me that the Lord has my future in His hands. It’s easy for me to get caught up in the fact that my life is not following the “normal” course for someone my age, and I’ll get to thinking that maybe that means I’m not headed in any worthwhile direction. However, the Lord is long-sufferingly patient toward me, and He is willing to re-teach me the lesson, over and over, that He has it all figured out. All of the little things I’m doing today may seem insignificant to me, but the Lord alone knows just how much of an impact they’ll have on my future, and in the lives of others, as well. I desire to be willing and make the decision every day to live out the purpose He has for my life, especially when I don’t understand. He has beautiful plans!
I may not be able to figure out where I’m headed, but I want to find rest in this fact: the Lord does know. It can be a scary thing to leave my own agenda, plans, and dreams behind, but the Lord is slowly at work replacing those things with the amazing things that He has planned for me. When I’m willing to trust that what He has for my future is infinitely greater than anything I could have ever dreamed up for myself, that is where I find rest for my soul.
My God knows, and He is all I need. ❤
Thank you so much for reading this post! I ended up sharing a lot in it – I’m thankful for what the Lord placed on my heart to write. ❤