Hi guys! Happy Tuesday to you. ❤ The topic of today’s post is something I’ve never written about before (and this will probably be the last time, as well, haha!), and that is medical fears. I will be talking about how I used to feel as a child, and why I feel so much better about it now.
If I can be an encouragement to you – any readers that have medical fear/s, for most people have at least one! – then that is absolutely wonderful because I hope I can inspire you. I know how hard it is to feel better about something that causes us to be fearful, but I would love for you to hear me out – just take into consideration what I share here.
Thank you in advance for reading! I hope that you enjoy.
Overcoming Medical Fears | My Story
Fearing Pain: My Childhood
Growing up, I always struggled to be okay with discomfort. I found it extremely unbearable on various levels to trip and scratch up my knee, bump into a wall and get a bruise – even a paper cut was aggravating. This trait troubled me for years because I was unwilling to move forward in my perception of pain to any degree.
I didn’t like doctors. I became upset when I hurt myself. It was even worse if someone accidentally hurt me – I always saw their mistake as my burden. Looking back, I truly regret being stuck in that mindset up until about the age of sixteen.
Yes. I spent over a decade in underlying agony.
It’s a painful thing when you can’t take any discomfort in stride, and then along the way, also being unable to forgive others … and yourself.
But this was my reality.
Where I Am Now
Very recently (especially this past week), I went to the doctor multiple times – and for various reasons. From getting my eyes checked to attending a consultation at the oral surgeon’s, I needed (and still do) different work done – and I’m not too keen on much of it. Some of the things were slightly invasive, and others were simple check-ups. I experienced a bit of discomfort a few times, but nothing excruciating, for which I am extremely grateful. I realized that fear laced many of my thoughts these last seven days, which I’m not proud of, but it got me thinking.
The more I’ve thought about it, the more tired I’ve become of living in fear of medical things.
Visiting the doctor and needing something fixed from time to time is not worth the stress that I put on myself. Even when a procedure isn’t going the way I’d prefer, it is very important that I visit the doctor – I have no idea what we’d do without them!
Because of this, I have lately been scrutinizing the exact reason as to why I am afraid.
Do I have legitimate reasons for feeling as frightened as I do?
Do appointments always end up going just as poorly as I project they will?
Will I ever be able to say I was happy to have been so anxious about these doctor visits days before they happen?
No – that is the answer to all of them.
To make a long, painful story of my life short, my perception was greater than my pain.
Finding Comfort in The Bible
There is something absolutely calming to me about the Lord’s Word. I find it impossible to read the Bible with a frown on my face, with anger clouding my thoughts, or with unforgiveness in my heart – you can’t do it. The times that I have approached Bible-reading time with that countenance, my behavior automatically became better … and I have no other explanation for it except that His Word changes me.
Whenever I open the Bible to a passage of scripture, whether I’ve been there thousands of times before or I’ve only visited that page once, I’m always struck with the unshakeable fact that these words were breathed into being by the Lord God Himself. I can’t explain to you what a pleasure it is every time to know that He is the One behind every book, every chapter – each and every word that I find there. Regardless of which part of His Word I read, I become awe-struck every time – and I love it.
I have recently taken to perusing the Bible deeply when something troubles me. When I’m not having a good morning, I turn to His Word. When something has shaken me so bad that I’m literally trembling, one of the only things I know to do is open my Bible. I have come to rely on its everlasting wisdom and encouragement, regardless of what I’m going through.
It has become a habit over the years for specific verses to come back to mind – especially when it comes to current trials. If I’m scared, hurting, anxious, or in any way upset, there are passages that I know to turn to that will calm my aching soul. The Bible never fails to be a shining light to me even on my darkest day.
The Lord knew that we would need a place to turn to when life gets rough. That is why one can find constant, immediate encouragement throughout His Word – you can’t get very far before a verse has caught your attention and slowly works its way into your heart. My favorite verses are always changing, because that’s how much studying His Word means to me.
So, how has this led me to where I am today?
No Longer Living In Fear
I have learned, especially through the power of the Holy Spirit, that it is not His will for me to live afraid. I can’t walk this earth having anxiety about the next few (and even several) steps I take, and this is something He has been helping me with lately. I have been able to go through a few minor medical procedures this past week that I would have been completely horrified by even a year ago … and that is absolute PROGRESS for me. ❤
Looking back even on these recent times, I can see how He has been at work in my heart … and that is a true blessing to me, even in this present moment.
When it comes to aggravation toward myself and others for accidental pain … that is still something I’m working on and praying over today. Yes, steps have been made forward, but I still have a long way to go … and I know that the Lord is already by my side.
So, to the ones reading who have disliked all things medical like I have for so long – have you truly taken a look at how you perceive doctors? I know how easy it is to be physically, emotionally, and mentally unable to bear some of the procedures that must be done, so I know where you’re coming from. But I would like to encourage you today to think deeply about how you look at these situations, versus how they actually are.
There are times when we’ll feel left alone to carry the weight of our burdens … but that was never the Lord’s plan for us. One of my favorite scriptures can be found in Matthew:
“Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
– Matthew 11:28
I hope and pray that I have been an encouragement to you today! 🙂 Even when we feel lost in the mentalities we’ve had for years, there is so much hope to be found in the loving grace of Jesus Christ. If you’d like to talk about any medical things you have gone through or are currently going through, I would be happy to listen – I know how comforting it is to talk about things like this with someone.
Thank you so much for reading!