3 Things You Might Not Know About Me

3 Things You Might Not Know About Me

Hi guys! I hope you’re having a beautiful weekend! Today, I’m here to talk about some things that have been on my heart recently, and they all happen to be topics I never bring up in the blogging world. That’s not to say I’ve been hiding them, because there are SO many things that we experience and feel, and it would be near impossible to write about them all! So, I’m here to be a bit vulnerable with you today, and I would love to connect with others who are going through something similar to what I’m experiencing right now! I’ll be here to support you (:

If you haven’t already scrolled down to see what the three things are (I know you totally did, lol), I’ll share them with you now!

1. I am extremely introverted and suffer from social anxiety.

Online, this personality trait doesn’t in any way shine through. I love reaching out to new bloggers all the time, and I enjoy having conversations with others via comments and/or email. To all the people who know me in real life, however, I am a different person. I’m beginning to think that maybe my blogger self (or the real life me, either way) is the other’s alter ego, they are such polar opposites! I struggle to have basic conversations with new people, I consistently go out of my way to avoid interaction with others when I’m out and about (i.e. choosing self-checkout instead of the regular register), and I especially feel awkward about striking up conversation with anyone outside of my family.

This is not because I’m lacking in social skills.

I’ve been bullied.

Since I was ten years old, I have been [periodically] dealing with cyberbullying, exclusion from church groups, and just your average bullying, too. People don’t like me, guys. lol But that’s not true about everyone! The nice people that I do meet, I struggle to get along with because I’m blaming myself for other people hating me without cause. lol I live a sad life, y’all.

But there’s hope!!

I am not staying in any social situation that’s bad for me. Family, friends, church … online, real life – if it affects me negatively, I leave it.

I am learning to see the abuse I have endured for what it is; a problem of the accuser, not my own. It’s not my fault; I am simply the target of their anger and depression.

The past is behind me. I desire to slowly get more comfortable reaching out to others in real life, in the smallest of ways, and letting whatever might come at me slide right off me.

I found a few books at the library yesterday that will help me with this!! If I enjoy reading them, you will most likely see a post or two on them in the future.

Now, on to my second point.

2. I have a sensory processing disorder.

Since childhood, I was known to respond to physical and audible stimuli more intensely than most. Loud sounds were very bothersome. I hated getting hurt. I was extremely ticklish and didn’t like being touched. I also found strong smells/odors very offensive and overwhelming. On the positive side, I was able to hear conversations that were being had in the house rooms away from where I was. I had a very good ear for the tones of voices and, over the years, have developed a strong ability to accurately impersonate many different people.

The traits that I mentioned above have carried over into my life as a young adult, as well. When it comes to how I react to being touched, hearing loud noises, and smelling something strong, as well, everything feels more intense to me than others. It is very bothersome, and as I am only just beginning to understand this about myself, it is quite hard to take in. Truthfully,

The fact that ‘disorder’ is in the official term was upsetting to me.

When I think of disorders, I don’t picture something like this. I see a disorder as something different from everyone else, and I don’t want to be different; I want to fit in. I suddenly felt like I was not like everyone else … but that isn’t the case at all.

I was beginning to let this shape the view I have of myself, instead of letting it be the answer to my problems.

When I realized that, I was instantly able to overcome that anxiety! I am so thankful that the Lord led me through this, because it got off to a rather rocky start. ❀

I found a book at the library on this subject, as well. (If you couldn’t already tell, this enlightening library visit is what prompted this post, haha!) I really hope that it helps me – I’m sure I’ll get at least a little something out of it! – and if I do, I’ll share my findings with you guys.

On to my third point. This is the most apparent one, as it has shown itself in little ways during my time of blogging!

3. I am a perfectionist.

Is this one a shocker?? Probably not, haha!! The May blogging challenge is proof of this – not the challenge itself, but keeping up with my normal post schedule most of those days, too! My mom pointed that fact out to me when I was later trying to figure out why I was so stressed throughout May, LOL.

But my perfectionism is not, and I repeat, not isolated to my blogging life.

If I’m going to play a game, or make a craft, or bake a cake, etc, the finished product has to be perfect, or I absolutely despise it and get upset at myself for failing my own unattainable goals. *sighs* The cycle is endless.

Instead of learning from past mistakes, I get upset at myself for what I just did!

I know that there are many other perfectionists out there, and that there are all forms and levels of it. The one thing I do know is that mine hinders my happiness in many ways, and that there are steps I can take at overcoming it – or, at the very least, toning it down.

If you guessed that I found a few book on perfectionism at the library, then you’re absolutely right, haha! I’m very excited about this one, actually – not because it’s more exciting than the other books I found, as they all look great, but I had no idea there were books like this out there! I can’t wait to read it!

Here’s the list of the books I found, if you’re interested in checking them out yourself:

  • Quiet Influence: The Introvert’s Guide to Making a Difference by Jennifer B. Kahnweiler, PhD
  • The Happy Introvert by Elizabeth Wagele
  • The Highly Sensitive Person’s Survival Guide by Ted Zeff, PhD
  • The Everything Guide to Coping with Perfectionism by Ellen Bowers, PhD

Thank you sooo much for reading today’s post! It gave me such joy to write all about this, and I would love to talk to you in the comments below. x

57 thoughts on “3 Things You Might Not Know About Me

  1. Thanks for sharing this with us! Bullying truly sucks, but it’s good to see that you maintain a positive mindset. And it’s true that when someone bullies you, it says something about them, not about you. On a different note, I’m also introverted, haha. We can be introverted pals! 😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Aww you’re welcome! It really does, and yes, that is an important thing to remember. It’s easier to handle it when it’s looked at in that light! And that’s cool! Yes definitely, haha πŸ™‚ ❀

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Maggie, you are such a wonderful person and very brave to post this. It obviously all means a lot to you and I’m grateful that you’ve shared this post. You’re an incredibly strong person and who cares if your a perfectionist, it all pays off because your blog posts are beautiful! Keep smiling chick xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. that was a interesting read. You have very candidly told about yourself…… we loved it….. not all people in this world will like you or me….. but who cares….. there are many who like you….. not all will have good opinion about you and us all….. but who cares…… there are so many who not have that…..

    thinking about every one is not what we are suppose to do…. your writing is good….. you seem to be very strong…. so cheers…. and keep writing….. we all here love it…..

    Liked by 3 people

  4. How can you tell if you have social anxiety vs just being introverted? I’ve wondered myself if I am perhaps a little abnormal in how introverted I am. I can talk to strangers okay but am afraid to do anything in public that might draw attention to myself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think there’s a fine line between those two things. The main distinction between introverts and extroverts is how we thrive in life – introverts prefer quality independent time, while extroverts love being around other people. Social anxiety is one thing that many introverts struggle with, on all different levels. πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you for sharing! πŸ™‚ I am also a perfectionist, and I have also struggled with bullying in previous years. Sometimes people will try and bring you down, but you just have to remember why you were higher than them in the first place ❀

    Incomplete Thinker xx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I love your openness πŸ™‚ I think your honesty just makes your writing all the more enjoyable and relatable. We all have issues, but we struggle admitting it. When someone has the courage to push themselves, well, it has a domino effect. “So and so can do this, I can do too.” I didn’t know about different sensitivities people can have till I roomed with a girl who became a very close friend of mine. She has been working through what gives her issues, or makes her feel unpleasant and she says overall she has gained progress.

    I am sorry to hear about people bullying you and isolating you. Like, if I saw you in my church, and even more so, understanding your story, where you’re coming from, I’d like to sit down have some iced coffee and just chat. Some of my closest friends, including myself, are introverts. It takes time to find a place you feel comfortable, safe, and secure in. But Maggie, πŸ™‚ I’m so happy to tell you, when you find it, you’ll know. I used to not believe this.

    I’m grateful for our blog friendship, and continuing to support each other in writing. It’s wonderful books are there for us!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks so much for your comment, girlie ❀ ❀ I truly appreciated it! Different people (including yourself) have mentioned admiring my openness, and I'm thankful that it makes my posts enjoyable to read, because that's how I love to write! Sometimes, I'll feel anxious about sharing something, but in the end, I'm able to help others going through the same thing or something similar, and that makes it worth it. πŸ™‚ Yes!! Knowing that we're not alone in our struggles makes the burden easier to bear and overcome. I'm glad that your friend has learned to work with her sensitivities! I'm currently working on mine, and I've learned a lot on what can help me.

      Bullying is so hard, especially when I start blaming myself for their twisted opinions of me. Teenagers, and even adults sometimes, are close-minded and don't like reaching out because they're happy with who they're already friends with, I suppose. I've never gotten to experience fellowship in a church before, and I've visited five different churches, which is quite sad! Thank you for your encouragement ❀ I'm grateful for our friendship, too! Yes, books are absolutely amazing(: xx

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Omg thanks for sharing! We all have issues and it’s because we weren’t born to be perfect. My friend also has number two but I never knew it was a disorder. It’s actually pretty cool to have strong hearing (haha not to spy or anything πŸ˜‚). I have the hearing of a gramma due to my annoying classmates and siblings πŸ˜‚ Like seriously this guys sang in my ears all year.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re welcome! Yes, amen to that πŸ™‚ oh that’s cool! Yeah it can be called different things. Whatever term is used, it just refers to being more sensitive than most people. Haha I enjoy the strong hearing part! Oh goodness, I feel that way when my brothers are being loud and playing around; my ears always start ringing!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Ughhh I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been bullied Maggie! You’re such a beautiful and precious person I can’t believe anyone would ever do that to you! I really wish I could give you a big hug right now. I’ll be praying for you ❀❀

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you sooo much for your kindness and prayers, Veronica! ❀ ❀ even though the bullying has ruined my self esteem at times, I'm trusting that the Lord is taking care of me, and that He has a reason for allowing it to happen πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  9. These were definitely things we never knew about you. It’s great that you KNOW yourself so well. πŸ˜€ But that’s okay, nobody is perfect. Tell us about the books once you’re done reading them.πŸ‘πŸ»

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Thanks for telling us these things, not many people would be that brave to be open like this. Ive been praying for your family across the last few days with hurricane Irma situation!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Putting a name to something that bothers you always helps you to process what is happening with you / around you. However, I do think that being a highly sensitive person is categorised as a character trait and not a disorder, if that helps you in any way πŸ™‚
    (And yes, I’ve read a lot about this…)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s very true. πŸ™‚ And yes! It has its benefits, and it can be worse for some people than others. Looking at it like that does make it easier to handle and understand. πŸ™‚ Thank you for that insight!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. This is so personal and thank you for sharing this to us, Maggie πŸ€—

    I know you don’t like referring to it as a disorder but I never knew that it exists. Are there times that you really get annoyed with it? I mean.. When you’re hearing stuff that you don’t want to hear and all? What do you do when that happens?

    Nevertheless, so what if you’re a perfectionist right? Like, c’mon, look at your posts! It’s perfect! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aw you’re welcome, Amielle πŸ™‚ ❀ I wouldn't have known that it exists, either, except that I have it! It isn't widely-known about, as far as I can tell.

      It is very agitating at times, especially when music/noise around me is too loud. I'll either ask the person to stop when that happens, or plug my ears and leave the room, lol. It's like the volume in my ears is always set on high, so different sounds (only some) are too overwhelming to keep listening to. Haha that's so sweet of you! Thank you! I do put a lot into my posts:)

      Like

  13. Hi Maggie.
    Thank you so much for this insightful post- it’s really nice to know that you feel so connected with your readers. I have only been reading your posts for a short time but they all seem to have so much effort put into them. Well done!

    Ginger

    Liked by 1 person

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