Experiencing This Change

Experiencing This Change
in His Child, Learn About Me 504 Words

Today is a new day.

I have spent nearly the past year of my life (at least!) living in the belief that past mistakes must dictate my actions for the new day. For the last twelve months especially, I have held things against myself – and my family, too, really struggling with being able to forgive, to let go and exhibit grace. It’s been a bumpy journey, trying to figure out why I’ve felt like this for so long.

The day I realized I was shackled to these sins was the day I could let them go.

I have prayed about this problem often, and now I can see that on my hardest day, at my lowest point, the Lord was still there for me. I’m always unable to see His hand at work until I take a step back – and what I can now see is absolutely breathtaking.

He is able to use every problem, sin, mistake, and shortcoming to lead me back to where I need to be – and He already has.

He has taught me about grace, forgiveness, mercy, kindness, and love.

For the past year of my life, I was too focused on taking care of me, of dealing with my own issues … and I no longer took the time necessary to nurture the beautiful relationships I had with my family. I left them behind in my own despair … and even then, nothing changed. The friendships I had with them were going downhill, as well as my self-esteem – and self-control. Focusing on “taking care” of myself didn’t help at all.

Because I wasn’t looking to the right Person.

The moment I laid all of this baggage, these burdens and worries and past mistakes, all down at the feet of my Lord and Savior, I felt a release. A literal weight was off my shoulders as He took them onto His own.

I had been carrying them for too long.

The pit of despair will take quite a bit of time to get myself out of … but I now know that the Lord and my family are waiting for me at the top. I know that they all long for the moment of my return, when I can finally be the loving person I once was, the caring person I often am, but can definitely be at all times. I’ll no longer have anger, impatience, and problems with forgiveness; they have all shown me the important thing I had left behind these past twelve months.

LOVE.

Love for my family, love for the Lord, and very importantly, love for myself. When I stop judging myself and give it all to Him, it is then that I’m able to love and care for others – not before.

It starts here – in my heart. And the new days that come, including today, will not continue to carry yesterday’s burdens.

I am learning to give, to let go, to learn, and to love.

Today is a new day.

— Maggie

57 thoughts on “Experiencing This Change”

  1. All make mistakes because we are humans!! But we should not hold them for long rather we should learn from our mistakes so that we don’t stumble again. One mistake gives us path for many new things!! Listen and understand the preaching of parents and elders because their experiences will help us not make those errors again!! Well written and beautiful message given!

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  2. Wow that was sooo amazing!!!
    Loved it💕
    I have been going through the same thing myself and last night I had a real break through in my spirit. The last couple of weeks I had struggling with knowing that God was in control of everything and that who I am and who I want to be he also had complete control over to make the change. For me it was just that simple but important reminder that he was still sovereign no matter how much things looked bad or how much I wanted to walk form everything that Changed my prospective on everything in my life . I realised he that he has already created a path for me to walk on but in my fear and lack of trust wanted to make my own path to walk on.

    Like you said after I had that mini cry and prayer moment it literally felt like this massive weight had been taken off my shoulders and I was free and at peace again
    It was awesome💖💜
    Thank you so much for always being so open and to share your struggles it’s what I love the most about your posts!!

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    1. Your story is so beautiful and inspiring!!! Thank you for sharing. 💓 Yes, our Lord is in control of everything! He has it all in His hands:) It’s my pleasure! Aw thank you so much 💞

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  5. :):):) All I can do is smile at this Maggie. I have seen such a huge change in you since the Good Lord crossed our paths, and I thank Him everyday that He did. You are so true that we get so focused on “fixing” ourselves, when in reality only God can fix us. And He wants to fix us, wants us to drop it at His feet. If left up to me to fix it, it will look like that necklace that’s been thrown in a drawer, and has all those impossible knots to get out lol. :):)

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    1. :):) hugs to you, Margaret ❤ Amen! Only He can fix us. It's taken me so long to realize, but I know that it's never too late. He's taking care of me. Haha, same here; I've never been able to fix anything up, because that's His job. It is part of His plan to leave everything in His hands. If we relied solely on ourselves and our own strength, we'd never truly know Him. ❤

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  6. OHMIGOD! WOW! 😍😍
    This post is absolutely amazing! 😊🙈 It’s so inspiring, motivating, and beautiful! I LOVE your words! They’ve brought a smile to my face! 😌😁 It’s just so encouraging! Thankyou so so much for writing this & sharing! ❤️❤️❤️

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  9. That’s wonderful Maggie. I’m so glad the Lord is revealing more and more to you the depths of His love. He WILL fulfill His plan for your life, Maggie, no matter what mistakes you may feel you have made. I have often struggled with the same judgmental thoughts towards myself and others. Over and over again, the Lord reminds me to come back to focus on His love. You CAN make it out of the pit. More importantly, the Lord is right there in the pit with you.

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  12. You are going to have so much love that you won’t be able to contain it, it will be pouring from your heart, your soul, and your mind. ❤ did you know that scripture says, those who love much, have been forgiven much ; ). We know what we have been saved from, and we can love others that much better. Despair and hardship trick us into believing their lies, and today I too work toward not falling into doubt but the certainty of Christ Jesus. Maggie, your honesty is beautiful and inspiring. Thank you for sharing your heart, and showing the light.

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    1. Ahh thank you so much, girl. ❤ I appreciate your kind words and encouragement so much! He has truly saved me from an awful lifestyle – I know that without Him, it would have never gotten better. He is changing me from the inside-out. ❤ I pray that you are doing well!

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      1. Thank you for your much appreciated prayers. We are prayer sisters on a roll! My prayer request is to get a call from TMO that they can move our stuff by the end of the month. I’m working on putting faith to action, and not struggle being fearful and doubting the power of God. ❤ peace be with you!!

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  14. This is such a beautiful post, Maggie! You’re right, past mistakes should never dictate your future! I’m glad you’re learning to let go and show yourself the grace you deserve! I’ll be praying for you and your incredible journey! Xoxo

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  16. Beautiful Maggie, really. I’ve dealt with much of these same feelings almost my whole life and even more so now. The difference is my family gets so judgmental and upset and friends want to rush you out of the mood or call you fake, say you’re changing. It only pushes the person away further. Sometimes you need to respect the persons need for alone time and not pressure them. Sometimes you need to show them you love and care but will be there for them whenever they are ready. You’re right, when you let it all go and and not focus so much on the problem things start to change for the better. Of course you can’t just sit around and hope for the change, you have to take some action too but keep that positive mindset. Try to rebuild the relationships only if they are truly worth it💗 that’s what I’m dealing with at the moment. Deciding which relationships are worth saving and what changes I need to make personally for myself

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    1. Thank you for your lovely comment, Lee. ✨ I’m sorry for what you’ve gone through with your friends and family. Yes, sometimes we really do need our space; the people who care about us know how to show that they’re there when we need them, without being up in our face about it. Sometimes, relationships don’t need fixing when they’re broken, because they were never really meant to ever stay together at all. It makes me sad to stop being friends with certain people, but it has to be done occasionally. You’re in my thoughts and prayers, Lee. I hope that things get better for you. 💖💖

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      1. Yeah that’s so true, not everyone is meant to stay in our lives forever. Some things we have to let go of in order to move onto the next chapter. Thank you so much Maggie💛

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  18. I looooved this!!!! You made me smile so much and encouraged me. The thing about me is that I don’t focus on myself, I’m more likely to focus on other people and I guess it’s bad. I guess I have to take a step and balance both. And of course, to lift everything up to the Lord! ❤ We just had our household talk earlier and it was about being brave– having a brave heart and our verse was 1 Peter 5:9-10– “Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a littl while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”

    💗

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    1. I’m so glad this encouraged you, Jirah! xx Yes, giving everything to the Lord is the best thing that we can do 🙂 I love that verse so much! It’s a huge encouragement to me. I hope you’re having a blessed weekend, Jirah!

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